lily mandelbaum, Elisa & Lily
Stepping Out From Behind the Camera

The next two What’s Underneath episodes feature yours truly — me and my mom. I’m up first, and as I watch myself strip down to my underwear, I am relieved at how unbothered and possibly even happy I am with my curves being all out there. That was what I feared most about doing What’s Underneath, especially after a lifetime of being plagued by wanting to look like Kate Moss. But between how inspired I’ve been by our brazen subjects and forcing myself to stare at my body in the mirror in order to retrain my mind, I can actually say that I’ve, for the most part, said goodbye to the side of myself that is unnecessarily critical of my natural figure.

I do, however, feel pretty vulnerable about what came out of my mouth. I remember when my mom finished the interview, I ran outside and screamed at my brother, “WE HAVE TO RESHOOT THAT!” (We Didn't.) "WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY? DID I JUST CRITICIZE THE WHOLE ENTIRE WHITE MALE RACE?!!" As hard as I’ve been on myself about what I revealed, ultimately, it’s been freeing having to accept what I said, even if, now, two months later, I see things differently. I've had to let go and trust that there’s beauty in capturing a true moment in time. It's not a matter of right or wrong. It's my journey. And there's nothing to be ashamed of.


Lily's video was edited by Andrea Cruz
What's Underneath is produced by Elisa, Lily, & Mona

Thank you, Chantelle Lingerie, for sponsoring this episode and for providing Lily with a personal bra fitting and the lingerie shown in this video.

Chantelle Lingerie is meticulously crafted to dignify a woman’s body. Designed to reflect a couture spirit while providing an exceptional fit, Chantelle Lingerie has enhanced women’s beauty, style and confidence for over 130 years.

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What's Underneath
Elisa & Lily