The stage was set. Gay men on one side, straight on the other, all eager to hash out the rules of gender, what it really means to be “masculine” or “feminine,” and the roles that these words play in our lives and style in 2011. This seating arrangement was not pre-planned or discussed at any point during the conversation, but for one reason or another, everyone chose to sit on their respective sides. Our discussion yielded some fascinating debates: How did our notions of gender play into the formation of our identities? How about in the clothes we each wear? Are traditional gender roles important in dating for straight and gay men alike? What does it mean to be androgynous in fashion? Each person brought a unique perspective to the exchange and, as the best ones often do, our debates often produced more questions than answers. Still, everyone’s choice of seating, something I’m not sure we were all aware of at the time, presents an interesting meta-perspective to the entire affair. Despite all of our self-aware and refreshingly candid remarks, the real question may be what roles we subscribe to without even knowing. Watch the action.